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What to Do If Your Students Insult You
Just as you can’t expect to get along with everyone you meet, you can’t expect to like every student you teach. However, when a simple personality clash becomes more personal and you are the victim of a verbal attack by a student, you need to take it seriously.
Insults can range from rude or brutal, such as telling a teacher to “go away”, to those involving profanity, racism or derogatory comments based on the teacher’s appearance, gender, etc. Be aware: studies by teaching unions show that many teachers suffer a daily barrage of verbal abuse, foul language and personal abuse. You don’t have to put up with it.
Make it known that you have a zero-tolerance policy against verbal abuse or bad language, and set definite sanctions for dealing with this behavior. Make sure your classes are familiar with this policy and are clear about what you will and will not tolerate.
As when dealing with any unwanted behavior, stay calm and don’t react on a personal level, no matter how angry or upset the student has made you feel. Verbal insults are usually a form of power-seeking or revenge-seeking behavior. The student may be testing the waters to see how far he or she can push you. Older students are more likely to use profanity to try to get you to respond.
Definitely tell the student that this kind of language or manner of speaking is not acceptable and that you will not tolerate it. You may want to apologize, and if (a genuine) one comes, it’s good practice to accept it and move on.
If the student shows no remorse or if the abuse escalates, continue to be assertive but not aggressive. Never stoop to the student’s level and respond with your own insults. If necessary, give the student a time-out so that he or she can calm down. Give the student the opportunity to accept responsibility for the behavior and modify it. Say that you need him or her to think before you speak, and that this language is getting him or her into more trouble.
It is important that verbal insults are punished, in order to enforce your zero tolerance policy. While you can tactfully ignore many silly comments or impulsive insults, be clear about what you expect from your students to encourage an environment of mutual respect and trust.
Remember: most verbal abuse and insults from students are offhand comments and not part of any deep-seated resentment or hatred.
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